Tomorrow I meet with my boss to see if I can work out a schedule that will work for us when I return to work. I do not want to return to work at all. I'd love to stay home and raise my daughter but financially that is not an option right now. So, the compromise is for me to return to work part-time - if my employer will go for it.
Returning to work is something I've been stressing over for weeks now. In the process of my stress, God has taught me a lot. I've learned:
1. To pray when I'm anxious or worried.
"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." - Philippians 4:6-7
2. To delight myself in the Lord first. This means to keep my priorities. My delight does not come from staying home and raising my daughter or any other "goal" I might have. My delight is to be found in God alone.
"Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart." Psalm 37:4
3. To commit my way to the Lord and trust Him to work out what is best. What is best may not be what I want - that is where the trust comes in.
"Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him and he will do this." Psalm 37:5
4. That once I've prayed and committed it to God to leave it with Him and rest. Again, that is where the trust comes in.
"Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him." Psalm 37:7
5. That God loves my daughter more than I do and He will work for what is best for her.
This has been quite the process. God has revealed bits and pieces over the weeks as I've worried and cried and prayed for a way to stay home and not put Adrianna in daycare. Now, I'm actually at the place where I trust that God will work out what is best for her. I know that what is really best for her may not look like how I picture it, but I trust that God knows what is best more than I do and I chose to rest in that.
So, for tomorrow, I will present my proposal and then leave it in God's hands.
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Seeing God in everyday life.
Seeing God in everyday life.
About Me
- Lisa
- Ontario, Canada
- I am a wife and mother of one baby girl. I am currently on maternity leave and praying that God will make a way for me to be a work at home mom. I have a Bachelor of Theology with a major in missions (which I haven't really used...) and I work for a large Christian non-profit organization.
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2 comments:
amen! i went through similar wrestlings when my mat leave finished up (my baby is now 21 months)....and i can say HE WILL DO IT!! He is 100% faithful and I am so excited how exactly He will lead you and your sweet family.
shalom to your home.
ps your baby is beautiful.
Oh I have been through this! =( Trust me, its hard on a mother's heart. Having to work, but wanting to be home. Know that I'll keep you in my prayers. And three years after my daughter was born, I am FINALLY going to work part-time. Yippee!
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